Sosa Went Too Far

T Lamont — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 04:22:36 +0000

When I saw the “new Sammy Sosa”, I was confused…

The first thing that came to my mind was “White Chicks.” You know, the movie starring the Wayans brothers dressed – and made-up – as two White girls. I never saw the movie, but I remember the previews and trailers. I think they stuck in my mind because Marlon and Shawn looked like weird, unnatural creatures.

Fast forward to 2009…and Sammy done lost his mind. Check him out:

Sosa looks like Eddie Munster.

Wow. What’s going on in Sammy’s head?

1. “My wife looks really good, so I want to look just like her.” Newsflash to Sammy: You still don’t look like her.

2. “You guys (the media) loved Mark McGwire so much that I figured I could be him.” McGwire’s ship has sailed. You guys actually make a great odd couple.

3. “It was the steroids, I mean, the over-the-counter supplement that I took back in my playing days.” Well, let’s hope that their cumulative effect is incomplete. Sosa’s new skin is very splotchy.

I’m certainly making light of Sosa’s decision. He’s defended himself by saying that the lighter skin was caused by a combination of a new moisturizer that he is using and the lighting in the camera shots. But moisture and pigmentation are two entirely different aspects of dermatology.

But deep in my heart, I really want to believe Sammy’s story. After all, I’d like to think that we are past the days of feeling so uncomfortable in our skin that we’d have to drastically bleach it.

I hope that is one ship that has truly sailed.

Unlike

We All Knew It

T Lamont — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 04:22:48 +0000

Next on the steroids list – Sammy Sosa. He of the 600-plus HRs. He of the testimony that he had never used any performance-enhancing drugs.

Sammy looks like he could play for the Bears...not the Cubs.

Sosa started out as one of those 5-tool player that people were raving about. As the seasons came and went, he came more of a one-two tool player…a straight power (and decent batting average) hitter.

But if you paid attention to his physique, this was no surprise to you. In the mold of Barry Bonds (in terms of body type), Sammy started out on the thin side. You could easily see the physical transformation that his body was undergoing.

This was just everyday news for baseball. No one was surprised, and it’ll be a long time before anyone is ever surprised by these sort of allegations again.

Unlike

Ball or Nuthin' » Sammy Sosa

Sosa Went Too Far

We All Knew It