Ball or Nuthin' » Brian Scalabrine

Celtics Favorites Due to Ugly Frontcourt

T Lamont — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 02:14:50 +0000

In the 2009 NBA Playoffs, the Boston Celtics were probably one injury away from competing for the NBA championship.

The lack of depth in the Green Guys’ frontcourt ultimately led to their demise. The biggest loss being the super-versatile Kevin Garnett. But the C’s also missed out on significant production when Leon Powe went down (he was recently signed by the Cavs).

In the past few weeks, Boston has taken some steps to keep them from coming up short on big guys. I now present to you…the ugliest frontcourt in the NBA:

Rasheed Wallace – Now, Wallace is not truly an ugly guy. But he’s not easy to look at either. And that patch in his head…what’s the story on that? Nobody really seems to know. I think ‘Sheed should have a press conference just to let the world know.

OK...I'll admit...I'm scared...

Kendrick Perkins – Big. Black. Tough. And ugly. He picks up fouls simply because his face looks foul.

Glen “Big Baby” Davis – The only reason – that I can think of – for him having a nickname of “Big Baby” is this incident. He’s probably the best lookin’ one in this group – that is if you don’t count his “cryin’ face”.

Shelden Williams – In an attempt to keep women and children away from their games, the 2007-2008 NBA champs signed him on. I don’t know how a guy so aesthetically challenged gets so many breaks. (In case you hadn’t heard, he’s married to Candace Parker – a mismatch of epic proportions)

Brian Scalabrine- What he lacks in face ugliness, he makes up for with his unathletic build. He looks like a mix between the Pillsbury Dough Boy and Carrot Top.

Well, there you have it. With a healthy squad on the floor, the Celtics are once again right up at the top of the list of contenders. But even if this team is unsuccessful in its quest this year, we all have to agree on one thing – - it can’t possibly get any uglier than this.

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Best “Teams” Win Game 7s

T Lamont — Mon, 04 May 2009 02:37:14 +0000

Well, we’re officially done with what had to be one of the most exciting first rounds in recent memory.

And while we all realize the importance of seeding and home court, it couldn’t have been more valuable in securing victories for the Celtics and Hawks in their respective game sevens.

The Celtics ousted the Bulls on Saturday in Boston, 109-99. As always, the home court seems to bring out the best in role players and bench players. Eddie House was a perfect 5-for-5 from the field, including 4-for-4 from 3-point land for 16 points. Brian Scalabrine contributed 8 points, and Glen Davis and Kendrick Perkins continued their improved play to spark the C’s to victory. In the end game, the more experienced team was playing at home with two All-Stars on their roster. It would have been EXTREMELY difficult for Chicago to upend Boston given this scenario.

Moving on to Phillips Arena on Sunday, Atlanta flew past Miami by the final score of 91-78. Joe Johnson and Josh Smith were the main culprits, but the Hawks also had key contributions from Flip Murray and Mike Bibby. In the end, D-Wade just didn’t have quite enough help for the Heat to pull out this series.

The Hawks are a dangerous team at home (as we saw in last year’s first round series against the Celtics)…capable of running good teams out of their building. Atlanta defended Miami very well – they make things tough for Wade (10-25 shooting), while simultaneously limiting open looks for Miami’s shooters (4-19 from 3-point land, including 2-9 from D-Wade). As a bonus, the Hawks went 11-23 from distance. They also limited their turnovers (9 for the game), which often makes the difference for such a young, developing team.

So, now it’s time for some great second round matchups:

Houston / Los Angeles
Dallas / Denver
Atlanta / Cleveland
Orlando / Boston

Stay tuned to www.ballornuthin.com for continued insight into these series…

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Why Is This Guy In The NBA???

T Lamont — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 01:15:04 +0000

Sometimes, a bum with no skills gets a phat contract. In today’s NBA, these are the aforementioned bums.

Jake Voskuhl- After averaging 6.3 ppg and 6.4 rpg at UConn, I can see why the NBA couldn’t wait to get their hands on him. Come on – - his intials are JV and he’s not even good enough to make varsity.

Jerome James- Every year it happens. A player puts up decent stats and gets a contract that don’t make no daggone sense. In his case, a stretch of 11 playoff games in which he averaged 12.5 ppg and 6.8 rpg was the ticket that he cashed in. So he’s set for life when he should have been sweeping the floor at Mickey D’s.

Marko Jaric- Has this guy done anything other than get splinters in his tail? He looks like Alf , and shoots worse than my pet dog. But someway…somehow, he lucked up and married a model. Well, I guess that gives us all hope…

Jaric married a model, so I guess he has more game than we think.

Brian Scalabrine – Supposedly, this guy has a great shot…at sitting on the bench every day for the rest of his doggone life.

Jason & Jarron Collins – If you have a bad night (which is often the case with either of these guys), it’s bad enough. But then, to be able to cut on the TV, and watch your twin stinkin’ it up – - it’s like experiencing the whole thing over again.

Dan Gadzuric – This guy don’t do jack. He runs up and down the court, and hopes the ball falls in his lap. Then he gets blocked by the rim.

Gadzuric should be arrested for impersonating an NBA player.

Mark Madsen – I think they used the call him “Mad Dog.” He should be happy because normally you have to play to actually get a nickname.

Kwame Brown – The former number one draft pick has wasted every opportunity that he has been given. He’s the only player I know who has to wear a mask in his home city to keep from getting his @$$ kicked by the fans.

Who else should be working a real job instead of fakin’ on the ball court???

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